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Patrick

10/19/2016

 
"I was 20 or 21 the first time I got in trouble with the law. I was trying to work out my personal problems on my own, but I didn’t know how, so I isolated myself. I didn’t want to talk to anybody about what I was dealing with. I was sad all the time, I felt hopeless, I didn’t have the energy to do anything, and I felt like nothing was ever going to get any better. I didn’t know which way to turn or who to turn to. I thought about doing drugs, but I never did. I had suicidal thoughts too, and I came close. A lot of the time I felt like I was in a dark room, like something was bad wrong with me. Since then, I’ve heard a lot of people talk about going through depression and they say that’s how they felt too, but I didn’t know what was the matter at the time.
 
"I could have gone on living with my mom---she would have been glad for me to stay with her---but I didn’t want to. I didn’t want to live out on the street either. And the only other place I could think of was jail. I knew that in jail I would at least have 3 meals a day and a roof over my head. Looking back, it seems stupid, but that’s the reason I did what I did. I didn't see any other options. I committed armed robbery, then aggravated robbery, and served a total of 15 years in state prison. I was out for less than three months when I robbed a bank and went to federal prison for 11 years. Again, it wasn't that I wanted to be a criminal, but I just felt hopeless and sad all the time and didn't know how else to keep from having to live on the streets.
 
"In August of 2015, I was released. I hadn’t gotten help, but I felt like I was pretty much over my personal problems and that I was ready to start living life. I went from prison to a halfway house, and the job coordinator referred me to a career-readiness program [HopeWorks]. They helped me find a job in the food and beverage industry, which is what I wanted. On November 9, I will have been there a year. I’m living with my mom now, which is what I should have been doing before, and I’m doing great. I enjoy every day. The sadness I used to feel all the time is gone now, but if it comes back, I know now that help is available. I received my driver’s license on August 17 of this year and I just bought my first car.
 
"During the time all this was happening, I spent a few nights out on the streets. I prayed then that the Lord would see me through. He was the only person who was there for me, the only one I could talk to. He was the only one who I knew understood me, no matter what happened, good or bad, and that’s why I love him so much now. My life was saved, so I want to give back and save somebody else. If my story helps even one person, I’m proud to tell it."

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The career-readiness program Patrick attended is HopeWorks, ph. 901-272-3700.
For information about depression, click HERE or HERE.

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