“While I was working as a security officer, I met a guy who did some recording, and I mentioned to him that I was interested in writing music but had never actually been inside a studio. He invited me to come sometime, but I put it off for a while because I was nervous. Finally one night I decided to go. I never intended to perform; I just wanted to watch and learn, but one of the four engineers asked if I had written anything. All I could think of was ‘What Up, God?’ They told me to stand, and as I performed, I began to cry. I had no idea why. My eyes were closed and I felt alone in the room, as if I were performing only for God. When I finished and looked back at them, the engineers were all staring at me with tears in their eyes. I knew in that moment that we had connected. I felt such peace, a peace so heavy I could touch it, like the presence of God was there. A friend of mine who read the work later called it prayer. I hadn’t realized that before, but it was true. There are people who pray through art, architecture, dance, or music, but mine comes out in words. I’ve come to realize that it doesn't matter what you create; it’s about having something deep inside of you and expressing it. When it becomes a concrete thing---a painting, a poem, a song---it’s so fulfilling. I think God gives each of us a gift that meets a need in this world. The night I first performed, I felt heard and it gave me life. I may as well have been in front of 4,000 people instead of just those four.”
What Up, God?
by Jaz Miller
I smoke more to think less
Messing up, I'm the best at
I look to God
What a mess
I created it
Now bless that
Fix that, now fix me
The last chance meant nothing to me
New beginnings
Same end
Accept that I can't accept peace
Accept me
Just accept me
For who I am
Expect me
To screw up
Take for granted
Then wonder why
You test me
Stress me
It stress me
Why You want the best of me
I take a path
And I do better
Then end up
It's the same me
Tame me
You can tame me
Why You don't just change me
My eyes closed
I can hear You
Don't that sound insane, see
Hear You
I can hear You
I know You want me near You
To put nothing above just fear You
All my wishes begin with dear You
Dear You
Dear God
All my doors all locked from the inside
Try to escape this life
Try to make You proud
Can't find a way out
So I just hide
And I tried my hardest
I can't deny
That I see my flaws when I think of You
You the Word
You the Truth
And I'm made in Your image
So how is it
That I just lied
Try hard
I don't try hard
On a good day
You get a little part
To surrender my soul
And give you my heart
It sounds easy, but it feels hard
And it's not easy
You want the whole heart
When can't You be happy with just a bit
Maybe then, only then
Can I find a way
To deal with it
Compromise, let's compromise
I know it all
Cause the world I'm wise
So how about I do whatever I feel and at the end of the week I'll give tithes
Yeah! That sounds good to me
Besides, giving tithes is a luxury
Wait. What You mean You want more of me
I'm special, You gotta have more from me
Chose me
Why You chose me?
I'm not worthy
Ask anyone who knows me
I give You a little then take what You give
And still I feel like You owe me
Show me
You gotta show me
From my view no soul below me
I have no self will
I mess up still
And when times get real
I fall deep
How is it You see the good in me
There is no good
That's how I have to be
I'm the type of person
Looks happy in the eyes
And still I find its pain I see
Let me help You
To show You
Why I can never be
What you ask of me
I don't do what I'm told
All the grudges I hold
And when push comes to shove
I'll blame You and won't blame me
Can't blame me
You created me
Sometimes I feel You'd exchange me
And if it wasn't bad enough
On the days I fuss
You simply just hush
And I realize
I strain me
by Jaz Miller
I smoke more to think less
Messing up, I'm the best at
I look to God
What a mess
I created it
Now bless that
Fix that, now fix me
The last chance meant nothing to me
New beginnings
Same end
Accept that I can't accept peace
Accept me
Just accept me
For who I am
Expect me
To screw up
Take for granted
Then wonder why
You test me
Stress me
It stress me
Why You want the best of me
I take a path
And I do better
Then end up
It's the same me
Tame me
You can tame me
Why You don't just change me
My eyes closed
I can hear You
Don't that sound insane, see
Hear You
I can hear You
I know You want me near You
To put nothing above just fear You
All my wishes begin with dear You
Dear You
Dear God
All my doors all locked from the inside
Try to escape this life
Try to make You proud
Can't find a way out
So I just hide
And I tried my hardest
I can't deny
That I see my flaws when I think of You
You the Word
You the Truth
And I'm made in Your image
So how is it
That I just lied
Try hard
I don't try hard
On a good day
You get a little part
To surrender my soul
And give you my heart
It sounds easy, but it feels hard
And it's not easy
You want the whole heart
When can't You be happy with just a bit
Maybe then, only then
Can I find a way
To deal with it
Compromise, let's compromise
I know it all
Cause the world I'm wise
So how about I do whatever I feel and at the end of the week I'll give tithes
Yeah! That sounds good to me
Besides, giving tithes is a luxury
Wait. What You mean You want more of me
I'm special, You gotta have more from me
Chose me
Why You chose me?
I'm not worthy
Ask anyone who knows me
I give You a little then take what You give
And still I feel like You owe me
Show me
You gotta show me
From my view no soul below me
I have no self will
I mess up still
And when times get real
I fall deep
How is it You see the good in me
There is no good
That's how I have to be
I'm the type of person
Looks happy in the eyes
And still I find its pain I see
Let me help You
To show You
Why I can never be
What you ask of me
I don't do what I'm told
All the grudges I hold
And when push comes to shove
I'll blame You and won't blame me
Can't blame me
You created me
Sometimes I feel You'd exchange me
And if it wasn't bad enough
On the days I fuss
You simply just hush
And I realize
I strain me