Antoine

“I don’t know where to start, how to start, or even if I should talk cause I don’t know what to do right now. I don’t know what people want from me. I'm tired. I get tired sometimes. My mama died when I was a kid. My dad, he left. I lived with my brother. He had a house and let me live there with him for a while. His kids was there too. I used to be back and forth to my grandma’s house. As soon as I got out of school --- I graduated --- I started this little band with a couple of friends of mine. We used to make music and stuff; we did shows. Then we fell apart and that’s how my homelessness started, when I fell out with them. I was by myself then and I had to figure it out. I was just by myself. In an abandoned house and stuff for a couple of years. That’s really it. April of last year I started coming downtown, but I was still homeless. I just changed locations from where I was at.
 
“The only relationship I got is the one I got with myself. People don’t last long. I can’t go to nobody for nothing. It ain’t worth having ‘em. You’ll be with somebody and it’ll actually be peaceful or whatever or however you want it to be, and another time… You know, people change. And especially if you’re missing something or lacking or might not have something, they look at you different. They change. They not gonna hold on to you. Know what I’m saying? Even though you’re reaching. Some people good enough. I ain’t there yet. I ain’t nothing right now… I feel like I didn’t give you a good interview. Maybe… maybe… I’m not good right now. I’m not at my best right now."
 
CM: “Tell me about your tattoo.” (tattoo in the shape of a cross)
 
“I got it just in case.”
 
CM: “Just in case?”
 
“In case I die.”

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