"I like nice things, but when I was younger, I used to go about getting them the wrong way. I thought material things would give me a better image, but that was just an illusion. I was still myself. Then I grew up, matured, and realized that material things didn't make me who I was. I knew I had to make some changes. There were a lot of obstacles, a lot of hills, a lot of mountains I had to climb. Sometimes my feet got tired, sometimes my knees got weak, but God never gave up on me. I kept my faith, and the hills began to get lower, the mountains shorter, and I knew that there was a light at the end of the tunnel for me."
"Are you going to be in the school spelling bee?"
"No. I don't like spelling, and I don't like bees." "Frank and I were living in an empty house. We had both been addicts for years, and I was supporting my drug habit through prostitution. We had burned all our bridges, and nobody really wanted to have anything to do with us. We had gone to church a few times, but decided not to go back. On the Monday or Tuesday after we hadn't gone back to the church, there was a knock on the door. I told Frank, 'Just make them go away', but before he could get to the door, there was a knock at the window. It was the pastor and a lady named Sally. When Frank opened the door, Sally just pushed him out of the way and came rushing into our little cat-hole like it was a mansion. She sat down on the side of the bed where I was and said, 'I don't know what's going on, but we miss you at church.' That's the first time anyone had ever missed me. I'm not very miss-able. Needless to say, we went back. At first, I kept thinking they wanted something from me, but they didn't. They just wanted the best for me. They accepted me where I was, still in my addiction, still living on the streets, not trying to do anything different. They always told me they loved me. Even when I was sick and broken, they accepted me. After a couple of years, they told me that they loved me, but I was better than that. They showed me the love I had never known. I never saw Jesus before that, or if I did, I didn't know it was him. "Then, in April of 2009, I was attacked by a man trying to rob me of my money and my drugs, and I became afraid for the first time. I couldn't support my addiction anymore because I was afraid to go out. I got sober by myself, but after about six days of sobriety, I realized that 24 hours was a long time, and I didn't know how I was going to stay sober. So I picked up the Bible and some papers fell out. They were papers from HopeWorks that had been given me by a lady at church a while before, but I hadn't looked at them till then. I came to HopeWorks in May and told them during the interview: 'If you don't help me, I'm gonna die.' They let me in. The love from my church and from the people at HopeWorks made the difference for me. "In May, I will graduate from the University of Memphis with a Bachelor of Professional Studies degree in Human Services. I believe God kept me alive so I could help keep somebody else from going down same path or to help somebody know that if they're there, they don't have to stay there. Once I graduate, I'll be looking for a job in my field. I'm not sure what that will be yet, but I'll be selling myself in a different kind of way then, letting people know what I bring to the table." Pat and Frank are married now. Hopeworks, referred to in this piece, is a non-profit organization serving the under-resourced in the Memphis area, striving to "break the cycle of crime, addiction, and generational poverty" through education, counseling, and career training.
"I dropped out of high school and started hanging out on the streets, but all my friends were still going to school and getting their diplomas. Finally, I decided I needed to do something. I didn't want to be that friend who was always asking to borrow this or that. I wanted to be looked up to, not looked down on. I'm working on my GED now and trying to get some work experience. Every day, I ride my bike back and forth to classes. I'm still thinking about what I want to do with my life. I'm still looking at options."
"My mother had custody of my son from the time he was born because I had drug and alcohol problems. I wanted to be a part of his life, but I knew I couldn't if I was still doing the same things. Plus, I didn't want him to see me like that. I had to be a better person. He was three years old when I got clean, and I've been clean ever since. I've worked hard on connecting with him. The more I'm around him and the more things I do with him, the more I'm able to bridge that gap. He's eight years old now, and we're both going to counseling."
"For his birthday this past summer, I took my son Solomon out to an airfield to see the planes and to check into flying lessons. He’s always had this incredible ability to focus on just one thing and has always been fascinated with airplanes. He can tell you about any plane ever invented: the engineering, the design, the mechanics, how they fly, everything. That ability to focus is true of a lot of kids with Asberger’s, and it’s an amazing gift. So, at the airfield that day, we watched as the biplanes flew in formation. When they landed, the pilots were standing a few feet from us, discussing an issue they'd had in the air. They were trying to articulate and determine the root of the problem, and Solomon was listening. After a few minutes, he sidled up, interrupted politely, and in detail nailed the issue and outlined how to correct it. He was 8, about to be 9. The pilots’ mouths just fell open, and one of them said, ‘Where did you come from?’ They took him up in a plane that day. He did everything: the pre-flight check, take-off, flight, landing, with no help at all. It was incredible.
"He’s in flight school now, and flies Cessna 150's, Cessna 172's, Piper Cherokees, and Cubs. He's been in the cockpit of a B17 Flying Fortress and handled the controls. He's the only nine-year-old with a B17 in his flight log. "No one focuses on the fact that Einstein had Asperger's; they focus on his ability to navigate the stars. In a talk about faith, my son Solomon told me that he figured out the clues: that God created the Big Bang, and when he said on the first day, ‘Let there be light’, he needed the Big Bang explosion to create the light. Asperger's is our Big Bang. And my 9-year-old son can fly airplanes! I don’t know of any other 9-year-old who has walked onto a plane and flown without instruction. My son, and people like him, have and will continue to shape our world in the most magnificent ways." "I was 16 when my sister died of AIDS. She knew she had it, we knew she had it, and we had to watch it take over her body and mind. That was hard. My faith in God is what got me through. I kept telling myself that everything was going to be OK. Losing her helped me to see that everything has a beginning and an end, and that everybody's going to die someday. We all go through the same stuff at different times. We all share the same pain; it's just different scenarios."
"The toughest time of my life was when I was a junior in high school and my dad passed away from cancer. I ride horses and compete in rodeos and have a lot of friends who do as well. Losing my dad was hard, but keeping busy with the horses and having those friends to support me helped me make it through."
"I'm learning how to say no, set boundaries, and not let people walk all over me. When my son, my only child, got arrested, that was very hard on me, but God is giving me the strength to make it through. I've had to learn to tell my son 'No' and to let him know that he isn't the only person who went to jail, that he took me with him. Really, this is turning out to be the best thing that ever happened to him. He's reading and studying and becoming more responsible now. And he's the lead man on his work team. He told me, 'Mama, you don't have to worry about me coming here ever again!'"
"The person I appreciate most is my mother. She's the CEO of a non-profit here in Memphis and has spent her life traveling between the U.S. and Africa. She instilled in me a love of travel and of seeing the world. And I would definitely say that any humanitarian side I have, I got from her."
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